“Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them.”-Brendan Francis.
As a woman who wants to start a small business, fear and self-imposed limiting beliefs are holding you back.
Left unchecked, these fears and beliefs gnaw away at you. They fill you with doubt, uncertainty, even feelings of being a fraud. They hold you back from the success you crave. You procrastinate and strive for perfection. And this means you achieve nothing.
Most people find it hard to switch up their thinking to change these thoughts that are keeping them ‘stuck’. I’m going to share with you three steps that will help you give yourself permission to feel the fear and take action anyway. As a result, you will loosen the grip of those limiting beliefs and fears.
When you have the courage to feel fear and give yourself permission to follow your dreams, taking that single courageous step, I promise, magic happens. Let me share my story with you.
For many years, I felt a passionate desire to help women. I attended personal development workshops. I read every book I could get my hands on. I qualified as a Personal Trainer and Holistic Lifestyle Coach. I would find myself sitting in workshops watching the presenter, dreaming of the day when I would be on that stage, sharing my story and inspiring others. I had a strong craving to be that person.
But when it came to putting myself in the position to help people, I always aligned myself with others, those I considered to be the experts, in the hope that I would ride the coattails of their success.
As much as I desired to be the expert, I had ingrained self-limiting beliefs and fears of being found out as a fraud. Of not being good enough. For a long time, I let these restrain me while I worked to create success of someone else.
It was a friend who delivered the wake-up call as we sat in a coffee shop one morning. We were deconstructing why the most recent alignment had once again left me dissatisfied, unhappy and no closer to my dream. She simply said, “Why aren’t you creating your own business? What are you afraid of?”
She probably doesn’t even remember the conversation now, but this one line was the catalyst for a rewarding, bold and empowering journey. A journey that has seen me successfully launch myself as a Coach, Writer and Speaker.
There have been fears of being judged and failing to face, limiting beliefs to work on, tears of frustration and tears of joy. But in making the decision to take courageous steps and choose success over fear, I have created magic. And today I am living my dream life.
I’m going to share with you the three steps that I used to create this life and that I use to this day to take action when fear shows up. (And believe me, it still does.)
Start by learning to give yourself permission to take that single courageous step.
The only person that can give you permission to do anything is you. Don’t ever wait for someone else to tell you,“OK, you’re good now, off you go, it’s your turn”. Because, trust me, it won’t happen.
Giving yourself permission allows you to let go of the fear or belief that has been holding you back,giving you the freedom to move forward. I use a simple method taught to me by a mentor. It involves creatinga personalised Permission Statement. In this statement, you anchor new beliefs and you use it every day to lay new neural pathways.
Your statement might look something like this.
I give myself permission to release the fear of failing. I am a successful businesswoman who attracts clients, profit and respect with ease.
Next it’s all about baby steps.
You need to break your big scary goals down into manageable stages so that you don’t get scared off right from the outset. Goals often seem like such a big leap that it becomes natural to convince yourself they’re simply unachievable.
I suggest breaking your big goal down into a series of smaller, achievable goals. Then taking those smaller goals and breaking them down even further until you are able to ask yourself each morning “What can I do today that will get me closer to achieving my goal?”
Finally, the most important thing you need to do is take action.
The fastest way out of fear is to take action.
Fear is this really cool built-in safety mechanism that is always going to be triggered by past experiences and it’s important to recognise it for what it is. When you can learn to feel the fear and recognise that it’s looking out for you, make friends with it!
My conversations with fear go a little like this.
“Hello fear. Yes, I hear you. And I’m super grateful that you’re trying to keep me safe. But you know what…? It’s OK. I’ve totally got this today and I’m ready.”
So my parting message for you is this.
Give yourself permission to feel the fear. Take that one single courageous step towards action… And watch the magic unfold as you create your ideal life and dream business.
Sonya Lovell is a Coach, Writer + Speaker, who believes in transformation, self-permission, magic, self-love, laughter and always being your best self. She weaves her magic by helping women transform their mindset, reminding them how to connect with their inner wisdom and showing them how to see (and do) things differently.
Sonya is the creator of the Live Your Best Life events, Rock Your Body Rock Your Life online program and is also the founder of Sonya Lovell Coaching; where she uses compassion, authentic connection and a whole lot of inspired passion to guide women out of fear and uncertainty, and move into a life they love.
Get started today with Sonya’s free guide to living your dream life.